06/18/2025
Happy Wednesday!! Let's take some time and dive a little more into the lesson we talked about Monday. The power of words. Let's start with the first point.
1. Think before you speak!
Anger, frustration, and hurt all cause our tongues to be quick to interject into the conversation exactly how we’re feeling or what we’re thinking. Situations that trigger those emotions can be overwhelming, and we can feel the need to respond quickly through our words. James 1:19 has this caution for us: 19 Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.
This is a challenging instruction. I don’t know about you, but I often think about what I plan to respond or
say, even before the other person finishes talking!Being quick to talk is human nature. Being quick to listen takes work and patience. You won’t achieve this skill overnight, but it is important to strive towards it.Before you speak, ask yourself these questions:
● Why do I want to say this?
● What do I hope to accomplish by saying this?
● Will these words encourage someone’s heart, or will they rip it apart?
● Are these words I will be glad I squeezed out like toothpaste?
● Or will I regret them, having to try and scramble to stuff all the toothpaste back into the tube?
If you’re having a moment of intense emotion—maybe anger, frustration, or sadness—take a moment away. Excuse yourself from the room or conversation and do something to calm
your emotions. Maybe it’s taking a walk, listening to some music, praying, talking to God,
or journaling. Once you’ve had a moment to process why you feel a certain way, return to
the conversation to speak. Understanding why you’re feeling the way you do before spewing ugly
words from your mouth that will only cause more hurt and anger is
important.
Proverbs 15:1 says this:
A gentle answer deflects anger,
but harsh words make tempers flare.
Take time to think about how you can respond before you speak.
2.Encourage and uplift others with your words.
Your words can be used to encourage and uplift others.Read Proverbs 16:24:
“Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the
bones.” Imagine that – our words can be like honey, bringing sweetness and
healing to others. This is a powerful reminder of the positive force our words can be. Think about the last time someone spoke encouraging words to you.
How did it make you feel? Now, think about the last time you encouraged someone else. The ripple effect of positive words can be astounding. Our speech has the power to uplift, inspire, and bring hope. As you go about your week, remember that your words carry weight. In a world that sometimes feels heavy, let’s be the light through the words
we speak. Encourage one another, build each other up, and let’s create an atmosphere of positivity that reflects the love of Christ.
3.Take time to apologize.
Inevitably, we will all say things that we wish we hadn’t. Inevitably, we will all spew anger from our mouths, and we will regret the words we spoke. I’m sure right now, every single one of you in this room can think of a time when you said something you still regret to this day. I want you to think of the person you said those words to, or maybe it was
someone you said words about behind their back.
Picture them in your mind. After you’ve pictured them and thought about what you’ve said that hurt
them, I have one question for you. What will you do about it? We’ve already figured out that once words are out of our mouths, it’s impossible to stuff them back in and erase them completely. But there are things we can do to make amends. Now, it’s important to talk about the people you spoke mean words to, but you feel like they deserved it.
We all have people in our lives who have hurt us, and we’ve reacted by trying to hurt them back.
This isn’t easy to hear, but it’s important to remember that just because someone’s words have hurt us, it does not give us the excuse or the right to
hurt someone back. That’s so hard when we’re thinking about someone who is our enemy and
has broken our hearts with the things they’ve said.
But just because they bled on you from their own wounds doesn’t mean your wounds must bleed back on them or anyone else. Now understand that I’m not saying you must make amends with this
person and become their best friend. In some cases, that’s not a healthy situation. However, taking the time to say, “I’m sorry,” can remove that weight of guilt from your own heart and shoulders.
So, how can you make amends today? It could be as simple as going to someone you love whom you know you’ve hurt and saying, “I’m sorry for how I treated you and the things I’ve said.”
And then make conscious efforts not to speak like that again. None of us are perfect, and we’ll all continue to make mistakes, but true
repentance is about changed behavior, not just a quick “I’m sorry.” It could be about sending a text or letter to someone you hurt who you
haven’t spoken to in a while. Or it’s about going to the person you shared gossip with, sharing things
you know you shouldn’t have about someone else, and apologizing for doing so. Explain to them that it was not fair or right for you to say such mean
things about someone behind their back. Whatever it looks like for you today, how will you make amends? Surround yourself with people who you know will challenge you with what you say. If you constantly surround yourself with friends who are quick to gossip and lie about others, make fun of others, or even bully others, you will find that those things become habits in your life as well. Think of someone that you know who tends to be on the quieter side. Maybe they don’t participate in gossip conversations at school or in youth group. Think of ways you could spend time with them this week and invest in a relationship with them. Or maybe you can’t think of anyone, and that’s okay, too. Spend time praying and asking God to bring people into your life who will challenge you to speak words of life, not of death. Maybe you can find a mentor who will check in and ask you how you’ve been doing with your words. Maybe there’s even a friend in your life now who you can challenge together to speak words of life, not death. If you have a best friend, and the two of you struggle with gossiping or speaking badly of others, flip the script and begin to challenge one another to speak life instead. You could pick other topics of conversation to discuss. You could set boundaries on the topics you approach together. Challenge and encourage each other to become people who think before speaking and share Jesus in their words.
4.Finally, watch what goes into your mind.
The things that go in will inevitably always come out, whether you realize it or not. If you spend a lot of time watching TV shows or movies where characters
cuss or speak in anger, those phrases and lines will stay inside your head and heart, and in a moment of anger yourself, they will come out. I know there have been so many times in my own life where I have said
something shocking and been like, “Where did that come from?!” I realized it was an influence of something I’d watched or listened to. What kind of music are you listening to? Our minds hold this incredible ability to memorize thousands of song
lyrics at any given time. What are the words you are filling your mind with every day? If they are explicit, curse words that drag people down, those are the kinds of things that will eventually begin pouring out of your own mouth. Watch the things you are pouring into your mind..Evaluate the books, movies, music, and social media you are filling your heart and mind with. It may be time for a change. Maybe it’s time to start listening to worship music on the school bus. Maybe it’s time to start memorizing verses about our tongues, like some of the ones we read earlier. And in the moments when it’s easier to watch a bad movie, spend some time praying or reading your Bible. Our words have the power of life or death for someone else. This is not something to be taken lightly. How will you use that power?